Love / Relationship

Topics:-
1) LOVE
2) COMMITMENT
3) RELATIONSHIP


1: LOVE


















Sometimes LIFE spent with someone for a lifetime may be meaningless but a moment spent with someone who really loves you is more than life itself.


We all talk so much about. How it can be truly defined ?
What is love?


It is one of the most difficult questions for the mankind. Centuries have passed by, relationships have bloomed and so has love. But no one can give the proper definition of love. To some Love is friendship set on fire for others Maybe love is like luck. You have to go all the way to find it. No matter how you define it or feel it, love is the eternal truth in the history of mankind. 

Love is patient, love is kind. It has no envy, nor it boasts itself and it is never proud. It rejoices over the evil and is the truth seeker. Love protects; preserves and hopes for the positive aspect of life. Always stand steadfast in love, not fall into it. It is like the dream of our matter of affection coming true. 


When LOVE occurs between two individuals. It bonds them and connects them in a unified link of trust, intimacy and interdependence. But that dosen't mean they should lost their individuality. The relationship should be such to guide, follow, enrich each other's personality. LOVE enhances the relationship and comforts the soul. Love should be experienced and not just felt. The depth of love can not be measured. 


A different dimension can be attained between any relationships with the magic of love. We need to focus on the goodness of the other person. No one is perfect, to accept the person ..as an individual with all positive and negative points is the true acceptance. 


But then arises the question if that is so..Why don't we accept or love just anyone? 


Why is that just a particular person only creates that special feelings.


The CHEMISTRY what everyone says.....is none other than COMPATABILITY.


The concept of Compatability is that the relationship which makes us completes in all aspects , where we are comfortable, and can be in our natural form where we don't have to disguise, where we can be our real self.


Depending on context, love can be of different varieties.
Romantic love is a deep, intense and unending. It shared on a very intimate and interpersonal and sexual relationship.


Platonic love, familial love and religious love are also matter of great affection. It is more of desire, preference and feelings.


The meaning of love will change with each different relationship and depends more on its concept of depth, versatility, and complexity.


But at times the very existence of love is questioned. Some say it is false and meaningless. It says that it never exist, because there has been many instances of hatred and brutality in relationships So many people are facing with such dilemmas everyday.


But love is not responsible for that. It is us, the people, who have forgotten the meaning of love and have undertaken such gruesome apathy.


Psychology portrays love as a cognitive phenomenon of : Intimacy, Commitment, and Passion.
Love is also defined as a high form of tolerance.
LOVE is all about sharing our joys and sorrows, understanding each other, providing space to each other, but always be there for each others need.


Appreciating, admiring, accepting, guiding, fulfilling , caring ........a companion for all the times.


Sometimes in Life we find a special friend, someone who changes our life just by being part of it. Someone who makes us laugh, make believe in ourself and convinces us that there really is an unlocked door waiting for us to open it.


To elaborate it and to understand its complexities, one has to be patient.
It don't happen suddenly ..it develops gradually 


Logic says everything in this world has a cause and an effect. True Love is the only feeling which is its own cause and its own effect. It is something illogical and yet above all logic.


Love seeks no cause beyond itself and no fruit; it is its own fruit, its own enjoyment.
Although love is at the root of our basic nature, Love for another human being must be cultivated. It takes time for Love to mature.


Love is embracing differences and discovering ways in which to build a common lifestyle, share decision-making, and take equal responsibility for the results.


Where happiness and well being of other person is more essential.


Its seeing an imperfect person perfectly. or rather completing and fullfilling each other's imperfectness.It is looking past imperfections in our partner and seeing the beautiful person inside.


True love seeks the happiness and well being of our partner


Love expresses itself in the mutual respect demosntrated between the two partners. Its foundation is based on integrity, respect, faith and trust. Love is the force that brings about unity and harmony.


It is a bond or connection between two people ....their mutual trust and intimacy, that enhances both partners.
It is the ability and willingness to allow those we care for to be what they choose for themselves, without any insistence that they satisfy us.


Love is loving someone without expecting anything in return; no judgments, no restrictions; no limitations; no expectations!


Its FREE and UNCONDITIONAL.................


TRUE LOVE pave the road of SELF DISCOVERY..................


2: COMMITMENT






For the success of a corporation, it is even more so for the individual. The most important single factor in individual success is COMMITMENT. Commitment ignites action. To commit is to pledge yourself to a certain purpose or line of conduct. It also means practicing your beliefs consistently. There are, therefore, two fundamental conditions for commitment. The first is having a sound set of beliefs.

"Stand for something or you'll fall for anything."

The second is faithful adherence to those beliefs with 
your behavior. Possibly the best description of commitment is "persistence with a purpose". The spirit of improving is rooted in challenging current expectation and ultimately taking the risk to make changes. These changes are based more on an optimism in the future than dissatisfaction in the past.It is the combination of both supporting and improving behaviors that makes up the practice of commitment.


Commitment is most difficult and most readily proven during tough times.

The real test comes when you can hold the line against the easy route of compromise.
Fortunately, paying the price that commitment commands has payoffs worth the cost - a reputation for integrity and, even more important, the commitment of others in return.

Commitment is a two-way street. You only get it if you are willing to give it.

There are many types of Commitment. Commitment to, family, spouse, children, job, country, self, ideology and God. The state of being bound emotionally or intellectually to a course of action or to another person or persons.

Therefore, when defining any commitment, it is useful to sort the commitment into its various parts and consider each part separately.

When we speak of commitment, what exactly do we mean? Well, commitment has several parts:

Duration---Depth--Quality--Purpose.
Duration:


While everything we do has immediate effects, sustained effort can produce other effects that are more lasting.If we wish to accomplish something of magnitude in the physical world, we ought to give the time required for the development of results
DURATION makes the other aspects of commitment more effective. A person who makes a real commitment of quality makes good on his word; he follows through on his intentions with the consistent application of diligence, focus, and energy over time.

Depth


Beautiful living means throwing yourself into life without reservation. Mediocre participation does not yield much benefit over virtually any amount of time. A person who takes a superficial approach achieves little more than shallow experiences, and a hollow feeling. A person who invests himself deeply in his projects and relationships satisfies himself and others
Therefore, if you want to commit to something or someone,make your participation as deep, meaningful, and positive as you possibly can.

Quality

In all things, quality is a powerful factor in satisfaction. A sound platform leads to a sound building which last for generations. Similarly whether we go for organizational quality or individual. The question arises...Are we going to produce something excellent or something no one would be proud of ?

The answer IS ......No matter how deep or enduring a commitment is, the quality of the commitment determines its real value.

Purpose

When considering whether to commit to an endeavor, everyone wants to know,
 "Where will this lead?" 
The answer is, we decide by the purposes we choose. Purpose is a power to be respected, not trifled with.
As an expression of its purposes, every enterprise generates a mixture of dynamic processes, both positive and negative -- for example, competing, cooperating, hoarding, contributing, persuading, compromising, demanding, etc.
 
The processes which predominate in our affairs determine our course across the sea of life.

Sometimes evrything is not clear at the start of the whole process....but a high-minded intention behind a commitment tends to uplevel the quality of the commitment.
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When all things are perfectly blended then a rich quality of precious bondings are developed and wonderfully rich involvement with life and with those you love is created.
Commitment in long run.....
As a river needs to flow in a certain direction..its flow is regulated in a path which leads it to its destination in some sea or ocean. Similarly the energy in our life needs some direction to flow. Today, most people are confused because there is no direction in life. When we are happy, there is a great deal of life-energy in us; but when it is not channelised, it gets stuck. When it stagnates, it rots. For life-energy to move in a direction, commitment is essential.

Life runs with commitment.A student takes admission in a school or college with a commitment. Needless to say, a family runs on commitment: mother is committed to the child, child is committed to the parents. Greater the commitment more is the authority and things become easier. Smaller commitments suffocate us because our capacity is much more.

Whatever we are committed to, brings us strength. If you are committed to your family then your family supports you, if you are committed to society, you enjoy the support of society. Commitment will always bring comfort in the long run. One should make a commitment to make the world a better place to live.

Difference between Promise and Commitment.
The question of when a relationship is committed is a source of much confusion and debate.
Promise and Commitment both are demonstrated by behavior, and an ATTITUDE consisting of thoughts and beliefs.
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In short, a promise is something you say, and a commitment is something you do. A promise is situation-specific. A commitment is contextual.
For a relationship to be truly committed, there are no exits- mentally, emotionally, or physically. When the going gets rough, you make it work.

Commitment is not a light switch that goes from "off" to "on." When building a relationship with someone, the level of commitment gradually increases.

Commitment in a relationship is complicated in that it takes two people, and it requires an alignment of FACT (events, actions) and ATTITUDE (thoughts, beliefs) for both of them.


Commitment does not comes just by living with someone or in a marrrage bond just by being in that particular relation. It comes naturally from deep within when we get everything in one relation, where all our needs are fulfilled and when we are completely satisfied in it.

True Commitment.....
Relationships are sacred encounters that allow us to stretch our spiritual experiences on earth. Our Society has made signs for Commitment. Its biggest sign is of marriage and smaller ones, such as introducing one another to parents and family, spending holidays together, Moving in together :The so called Live in Relationships.
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But NONE of these things define a relationship or the level of commitment. They are what we've been brought up to believe show commitment to another person.
Nothing could be further from the truth because a fully committed relationship is built on one thing only and that is love.


A truly spiritual relationship is built on unconditional love, which is an even deeper union of not only the body and mind but also the soul.

Unconditional love is the only true commitment. The willingness to share a part of your life with another person, another soul, and to let them be who they choose to be is commitment. It's agreeing to mutual learning and understanding.

Becoming bonded with another soul is really an experience that can be found in other ways than the traditional marriage, or whatever commitment we're seeking. It don't need a ring or party to mark this.

People around will know that the two person belong together just be feeling the energy between them. And there is no need to proof the love to anyone outside of relationship - ever.


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Two people are together because they choose to experience together, because of the one universal love that combines everything on this planet.The sixth sense which tells them that there is a balance between them .......a special bonding

Signs of Commitment......

To feel the Commitment .......the signs which can prove the true feeling of commitment, not a ring or ceremony or other external factors.

* When we can feel the Love of our partner for us.

* When there is a deep connection that goes beyond physical attraction.

* When we can share our truth in good and challenging times.

* When we are happy in the relationship.

* When both partner allows each other to be who they are without trying to change their real identity into someone they are not.
 


* When both parteners have Love , respect and understanding to each other's needs and also respecting each other's decisions.

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Commitment is another word for love and love doesn't need external signs. It just is and you can feel it when it's true and straight from the heart.....




3: RELATIONSHIP



















Everyone want their relationship to be a perfect, but is there such a thing like PERFECT RELATIONSHIP. Or it depends upon the two individual to make it perfect or say successful.


When two people are together not through any forced engagement nor just as a matter of habit, but because they alone can give each other the required freedom to grow, that is a truly amazing relationship.

Is there a formula to make a relationship work??

Not that one knows of life, yet LIFE knows no formulae, no absolutes. Most often things just happen. People fall in and out of love, there are fights and make up, patch over etc. And since the mind doesen't know any Arithmatoc of love there is no certain formulae for the success or failures of relations. There are so many ups and downs, the only thing you can keep is to keep constant yourself. As long as there are more ups than downs, more happiness than grief, the relationship continues more smoothly.

Life is all about managing yourself and the environs around you., the circumstances and events.If keeping low expectations and good intentions is one way to make a go. Than exactly what is the power of a relationship that keeps two people together. What is that intangible value that binds one to another apart from blood ties and social duties.

The determination to make it successful is the first step towards making it happen. Flexibility ia an important component which is beneficial to give the elasticity to a realtionship. A basic understanding of each other and particularly of each other differences can determine a long haul together.

As one moves along in life, one realises that what is more important is to have freedom to grow along one's natural trajectory. And a companionship that allows you to be yourself: where you don't have to change your innermost values, rhythms and choices for other. And where you don't need to change another's. This ends up in a tie which is beautiful and fulfilling, a dream come true kind of relationship.

The perfect kind of a man, woman or relationship is one where you can trust, respect each other's qualities . Where the two give each other enough space to grow away from each other yet always available when you need or at times of some shared moments.
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So as long as the basic values and principles have been sorted out and one is assured of a fundamental commitment to each other, one can learn to appreciate and respect each other's differences. Then it is the real respect and the test of true relationship.The magic is in the intention and recognising each other qualities and differences and accepting each other as one is.